Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Pretty Little Liars Winter Premiere “Who’s in the Box”




“Who’s in the Box” … your sensitivity to Ali’s grave at the Mausoleum is overwhelming. Really? Calling it a box? Who’s in the box? Jack.  Jack’s in the Box. That is an appropriate title for a fast food restaurant commercial. I’ll get over it but I mean seriously, person in charge of the 4 words to summarize the episode into a title, you should be fired.

Hellllo Hellllo Hellllo! Per usual, we were given NO answer and really NO new material. The sick sadistic way I. Marlene King keeps us coming back for more, by giving us NOTHING. I can’t not watch. It is like a beautiful train wreck and that is a horrific statement because train wrecks are tragic NOT BEAUTIFUL. 

SPOILER ALERT: For everyone, who was hoping next season (season 5) would be the last, King said in an interview that the season 4 spring finale basically opens up a whole new world for the liars. Your questions will be answered but there will of course be more new unanswered. She sees the show now going on to surpass the original planned 5 seasons. I DON’T want it to end but I DO. DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? I NEED ANSWERS and I needed them yesterday. I don’t know how much more of this I can take, but if it does ever end I will spiral into a deep depression only curable by having Spencer Hastings herself come over and trick me out of my already pre planned depression.

Having said that onto the episode, they gave us 12094182049 clues the yes your beloved Ezra is in fact A. His reading assignment to the class, “Jekyll and Hyde”, is a direct reference to his bipolar character. When Mona approaches Ezra he is reading a book of 3 books in one, the 3 books are “Rear Window”, “I Married a Dead Man”, and “Waltz into Darkness”. The background book in this scene is “Evil Under the Sun”. Like okay, we GET IT.  Thanks so much for the subtle hints…
During Ezra and Mona’s conversation they discuss fear. I think Mona is especially hurt by Hanna and has nothing else to lose. She has no other way to get friends other than to get back in the A game. So, she goes directly to the HBIC, Ezra. Yes, Ezra is a bitch. Cool threat at the end of the scene Ezra. Your metaphors are so hurtful. We learn about Ezra and Mona’s past relationship this season…

Now, in regards to this whole Radley situation Mr. Hastings sure pounced on the chance to take down Radley as fast as he could. Why? I don’t know. My theory is he has secrets there and he wants the secrets demolished with the building. He’s already fathered Jason Delaurintis so who knows what else he’s done. One theory that Mrs. Cavanaugh and Mrs. Delaurintis are related, comes to me when I think of Radley. Does Spencer’s dad know about this and want the secret to die before his daughter finds out or is he really just protecting himself and his own indiscretions? Spencer seemed like she’d be happier to see Ian back from the dead than to destroy Radley. Why? I think Alison has been living in Radley and she wants to protect her friend. Now that they know all the “dreams” they saw her in were actually her, Alison was really walking around in her nightgown in the abandoned part of Radley that night Spencer was snooping around. She even showed spencer where the nametag of “Cece Drake” was, and it looked like it was a collection of Alison’s things. Ezra would not have access to Radley and no one goes to the abandoned wing anyways. Spencer is either protecting Alison or has her own secrets there as well, maybe more answers to solve this really realistic show, with no lights, no protection, and no real parents or policemen.

I 100% think Aria is a part of the A team but has no idea that Ezra is A. SPOILER ALERT: Ezra tells Aria he is A or whatever he is, in episode 20 of this season on a ferris wheel. She is apparently very upset, which she should be but I don’t buy that she is genuine. In past episodes the books by her bed, like Ezra, were all about death and mental disorder. There are so many signs Aria is apart of the A team I’m too tired to name them. One being several things in A’s lair are Aria’s from her magazines to pictures. Secondly, the night Ali goes missing Aria is the last one we see drinking out of a red solo cup with her stuffed animal “Pigtunia”, which she apparently takes everywhere. Never.noticed.the.pig. Pigs are a big clue throughout the show… who knew? NOT ME. OINK. In the following scene Jason finds a red cup in his backyard, so one of the girls left the sleep over and was in the Delaurintis backyard at some point. When the girls wake up, Aria’s cup and pig are gone.  I’ve thought Aria and Ezra were bad from day one, but not necessarily together.

Finally in the last scene, A aka Ezra aka bitch, comes into his house in the cabin, which he clearly states to Aria that there is no cell service, television, and complete silence (great for doing A things or holding hostages), opens up his hidden basement into the black abyss. What is down there? My guess is either Cece Drake hiding out or Jason Delaurintis being held hostage.

One final SPOILER ALERT: as we saw in this episode Hanna was on her A game. No double entendre intended. Since her and Caleb are on the outs, she will thrust herself into finding out who A is, and she is going to be the one that figures out Ezra is A, FIRST. You go Hefty Hanna! I’m so glad you and Mona dressed like you were extras in Zenon the Zequeal tonight. It looks like Stevie Wonder chooses your wardrobe. Never change girl. I have read one conflicting report that says Spencer will of course be leading the pack, but I’m gonna go with the Hanna Banana Marin theory.

It has only just begun…

Until next week.

xoxo,

B

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