Hugging someone sounds simple enough, doesn’t it? IT’S NOT.
Most people are so awkward (me included) when it comes to something so easy it’s
baffling. Maybe I have high hugging standards or maybe I am just a human?
SIDE HUGS BETWEEN MEN
AND WOMEN ARE NOT ACCEPTABLE. EVER. We will revisit this later.
Let’s start with the girls. I’m not a big hugger of women.
It actually makes me awkward, girl on girl hugs, but they are necessary
sometimes. When you haven’t seen a bestie in a long time HUG. When you are
going through a hard time, or your friend is going through something HUG. When
you can’t contain your excitement about ANYTHING from a football win (if you
have ANY respect) to an engagement, HUG… Now, if you’ve just met a new gal pal
you don’t have to hug her, BUT side hugs (the ONLY exception) are acceptable.
If it’s not a good friend, but you are happy to see them then give them a SOLID
side hug. A SOLID side hug means you go
in enough to touch the other girl’s side. Not just arm on arm. Make eye
contact. Smile. Be pleasant. If it’s
a bestie you see frequently, you know the drill, let’s skip the hug; BUT NEVER
underestimate the power of a hug, they are VERY powerful.
Boy on boy hugs are so happy. Y’all are genuinely happy.
Smiling, going in for the full hug with some sort of handshake or fist bump or
pat on the back. You truly mean them and you are always smiling. If you could
translate that into how you hug a girl, your life would probably be easier.
Just be genuine.
Now, boy on girl hugs. The most important hug and for some
reason the most difficult, for boys. If it is not a good friend, then just say
hi to the girl, but follow her lead. If she goes in for the hug you best follow
through with it. Side hugging a girl is a slap in the face, especially if you
have EVER hooked up (you have absolutely NO respect). If you consider yourself
friends a side hug is not acceptable. A side hug really just says you could
careless. Kiss of death. Stop being awkward and full frontal hug the girl. Now,
don’t get all weird because I said full frontal. I mean give a real life full
hug. FACE ONE ANOTHER. Let the girl’s
arms be the lead and proceed to hug. A SOLID hug, one with the above directions
plus a squeeze and/or linger, letting one know you are so happy to see them, or
“it’s okay”, or you miss them, or I’m sorry, can fix a multitude of things.
Once again, if either of you are going through something a hug can really let
the other one know you are there for them. Some (most) guys have trouble
expressing themselves, so let the hug do it for you. If you are in a fight
hugging, a real, solid, meaningful hug can mend the fences.
ACCEPTABLE FROM BEHIND FULL HUG
If you can’t master this, you really need to go back to the
basics. PRE-SCHOOL. Hugs can heal brokenness. They are the easiest action to
do, and if you can do them right, then happiness and healing quickly follow.
Hugs can be magical. Hugs are a way to show emotion when you yourself can’t. Shhhhh….
Just let it happen ;) HUG MORE, ASSHOLE LESS. Let us piece one another back
together, hug-by-hug.
xoxo,
B
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