The TRUE meaning of Emoticons/Emojis YOU’RE WELCOME

There’s so much confusion with emoticons and even MORE confusion between the sexes. They say so much without one word yet; if the person on the other end has a different take on the meaning of said emojis then things can get WEIRD (insert appropriate emoticon for weird here) WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? WHAT EXACTLY DOES THAT MEAN? I’m here to let know what they mean. Everyone has their own translation, but these are mine, so obviously they are right. Enjoy

 

 The classic “bestie” emoji. This is a well-known emoji that can be used for many things. Not to be confused with the politically correct “lesbian” emoji, these girls are just great friends. When this is sent it can mean the following depending on conversation.

Deep Conversations: you get one another, you got their back

Normal Conversations: just a shout to your girl, or boy. I use it with the boys but the get all confused … then I use the “gay” emoji for best boy friends … me being the other boy…story of my life

                        Disagreements: you come in peace, you get it, you’re over it, WE’RE BACK

  This is one of my PERSONAL favorites. I feel like I’m one of the only ones using this and we really need to get this out there. The tongue with the rain means you’re drooling. YUM. That looks good. You’re starving. Its nothing sick like some people think. Straight up mmm mmm good. Now separately the “tongue” can either be stuck out like “whatever” or like the Budweiser frogs “ahhhhhh” minus the wassup.  IF you’re flirting, the tongue clearly means “yum I want” to the guy. Don’t know how guys don’t UNDERSTAND, but from yesterday’s blog, clearly we have some communication and thought process errors/differences.

 These guys are pretty self explanatory except the last one. First one, the “clap”, not to be confused with chlamydia, just means bravo, you’ve either made a great joke or point, touché.  The second one, “prayer hands”, can mean you are actually sending prayers to someone, thanking someone a tremendous amount, or begging for help in any situation. Finally, the ole “high five”, for some reason you people think this means touchdown, that’s cute GIRLS. If you see the similar triangular symbols, meaning movement...like in the “clap” J this is clearly a moving high five. Uses included the same as the “clap”, but in a less personal way, BRO.

Another PERSONAL fav, “Russian bombs” that as far as I know I’m the only one that uses this combo. So this is more of an explanation to the people who get these guys from me. Who knew the Russian had a beard?!?! Anyways, if I’m pissed you will get these simultaneously repeated. The “Russian bomber” expresses how truly mad at him. YOU THINK THIS GUY, THIS COMBO IS FUNNY? … ITS NOT, IM MAD

 Wink and a kiss.

Friendly: just showing your friendship love, appreciation, sometime even a thank you and I’m sorry depending on the circumstances

If you like the person: THIS IS FLIRTING, you want that kiss and your wink means lets figure that out

 Embarrassment. USED A LOT. You could be just plain awkward. You could be embarrassed that you didn’t understand something, embarrassed about something you have done or said, embarrassed about something you have done or said and DIDN’T know you did. Several of these guys in a row means you are extremely embarrassment, maybe after a drunk dial, text, night out. THINGS HAPPEN.

 

 I’ve never actually seen this used when someone is talking about an actual eggplant. This is a PHALLIC symbol and should NEVER EVER EVER be used by a boy (it has happened).

 These symbols are all used to express your unhappiness to say the least. When someone says they are sarcastically “suicidal” these emojis are definitely used in the sentence. If you just got some new meds, the “pill” emoji is used, or other in situations…

These symbols sans “pill” are also used as to express threats, DON’T MESS WITH ME and YOU’RE DEAD MEAT, is what they scream.

 THESE GUUUUUYYYYSSSSS. Who doesn’t LOVE these guys?! They mean EVERYTHING. I am making the face of guy number 2 right now… I make this face all the time. Just like, YEP I SAID THAT or I AM SO EXCITED or YES, YES I ACTUALLY DID DO THAT WHOOPS, and even a little flirting with these guys never hurt. YES, I use these men to flirt, if I like you maybe I’m flirting maybe I’m not. Cryptic little shits that I LOVE.

The “sad face with tear”… if he is THIS one with the BLUE TINTED head… you are VERY upset or VERY sad. The blue tint takes it to a whole other level. There are several sad faces, but this guy is the saddest of them all. Take him seriously. Someone is devastated.  Poor guy/gal L

 People think this guy is smiling really big. I interpret this guy as embarrassed, not as embarrassed as ole’ flushed cheeks, but he is saying WHOOPS or PLEASE and waiting for the other party’s answer praying it’s a good one, but knows there is a good chance the other party won’t respond well.

LOVE. You LOVE something that has just been said or you LOVE someone. The cat love means more that the human love emoji. I DON’T like cats and LOVE this emoji. IT’S SPECIAL

Friendship: I LOVE that idea, I LOVE you, GREAT PLAN, AMAZING

If you like the person: all of the above, but you are FLIRTING as well, you might LOVE them…like for real…

THE MORE CONSECUTIVE “LOVE CATS” THE BETTER

THESE GIRLS ARE OUT OF CONTROL. I couldn’t crop the “thinking man” out of it, and I DON’T care about him, only used when you need a moment to think.

TOP LEFT: no absolutely NOT, NO MEANS NO

TOP MIDDLE: whatever?

TOP RIGHT:  yep, it was me, guilty, volunteering, pick me, or hey!!!! Over here I’m trying to get your attention

BOTTOM LEFT: Blowjob girl….WTF IS SHE DOING? I don’t know…. Close your mouth sweetie. Unless sound comes with the emoji and she is whistling, she is most definitely blowjob girl

 Once again the “cat crying laughing” emoji is 10x funnier than the human. You’ve got me good.  You’ve said something HILARIOUS. The more consecutive crying laughing cats you get the BETTER. You’ve hit it out of the ballpark. I am usually laughing out loud at my phone, solo... when I use this emoji consecutively. It is also used when I THINK I’ve said something funny, or am joking around.

If I have reached just one of you today, I have done my job. I hope this helps you in your communications endeavors with your friends and partners in life. Why use words when an emoticon can encapsulate so much?

xoxo,

B